Strong Families, Happy Kids

Parenting Tips from Prevent Child Abuse Arizona
Examine Your Standards          

Examine Your Standards          

A few months ago, I had a checkup with my new primary care provider, who asked me a series of routine questions about my health habits. When she asked about exercise, I told her I ran about four miles, two or three times a week.

“How long does that take you?” she asked.

“About 30 minutes,” I replied.

“Well,” she said, “for heart health, you should be exercising at least 45 minutes.”

I raised my eyebrows. She went on to her next question. I chuckled to myself.

Forcing Change

Forcing Change

My father, who is French, had an expression he used in my childhood moments of impatience: “Forcer, c’est casser.” It translates to “To force is to break.”

Take Your Time

Take Your Time

At the beginning of the pandemic, when everyone was trying to get their bearings with lockdowns, work and life disruptions, and constantly changing information, a post circulated around social media that went something like this:

A choir is able to sustain a very long note not because everyone holds the note at the same time, but because singers take breaths when they need to, and then join back in.

Our work as parents (and as employees!) is like that too. In the effort not just to keep your family unit running, but also to strengthen it, you may feel like things will fall apart if you take a break or time away. It may even feel irresponsible to take a break when there’s so much at stake.

One Key to Good Parenting

One Key to Good Parenting

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about what it takes to be a good leader, and how that crosses over into parenting. In conversations with leaders I admire, I’ve realized there’s one quality I respect most of all, and I believe this quality might be the most defining characteristic of a good leader … and a good parent.

When I write “leader,” I’m not necessarily referring to someone with a leadership title. A leader is someone who takes accountability for making a positive difference in the lives of others—and isn’t that what we do as parents?

So what is this quality? First, I’ll tell you what it’s not: It’s not charisma, confidence, knowledge, or vision.

The Way We Show Up Can Give Meaning to a Difficult or Scary Situation

The Way We Show Up Can Give Meaning to a Difficult or Scary Situation

There’s a frequently cited quote by Mr. Rogers that’s often used to excavate the good from crises or tragedies. He told us to “Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.”

He’s so right. But not everyone gets the kind of compassion that I experienced when they face a crisis. It is not just that we help. It is how we help. By offering help in a way that is understanding, kind, and nonjudgmental, we can be the difference between something painfully hard and something that’s hard, but doable.

One Simple Action You Can Take to Make People Feel Welcome, Connected, and Safe

One Simple Action You Can Take to Make People Feel Welcome, Connected, and Safe

This past November, Prevent Child Abuse America celebrated its 50-year anniversary in Chicago. The celebration included a discussion with Dr. Bruce Perry, who is a member of the board, and Oprah Winfrey, who is, well, Oprah.

As is quite typical of her, in her address to the crowd, Oprah said something deeply meaningful. She talked about one thing that all children need. It’s simple. It’s free. It takes only a second. And it’s the best gift that we can give to kids in our lives, all year round. It’s also the best gift we can give to each other.

Strong Families, Happy Kids: Parenting Tips from Prevent Child Abuse Arizona

Strong Families, Happy Kids: Parenting Tips from Prevent Child Abuse Arizona

Positive Child Experiences, also known as PCEs, are advantageous or benevolent childhood experiences that promote positive development and resilience among youth. Researchers have found that positive experiences can protect kids from the negative long-term effects of trauma and Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs), leading them to become healthier, happier adults.

So how do we, as a community, create more PCEs for all of our youth?

Help: Giving and Receiving It to Build a Supportive Community for Families

Help: Giving and Receiving It to Build a Supportive Community for Families

All parents and caregivers will need help at some point. Normalizing this is a huge step in supporting families in our community.

While well-meaning people are quick to say, “Let me know if you need anything,” when we see a family going through a tough situation, it’s rare that someone actually takes them up on the offer … because it’s vague and because asking for help is hard in a society that celebrates independence and grit.

A Book Recommendation: “Parent Nation” by Dr. Dana Suskind

A Book Recommendation: “Parent Nation” by Dr. Dana Suskind

“I just finished ‘Parent Nation’ by Dr. Dana Suskind. Folks, this is it. It beautifully articulates why we, as a nation, must support parents. If we want to promote child wellbeing and prevent child abuse, we need to support parents. If we want economic prosperity, we need to support parents. If we want a healthy nation, we need to support parents.

The book outlines why and how the U.S. doesn’t have things like paid parental leave and affordable quality childcare, and why that needs to change. In the name of preventing government overreach, we’ve left U.S. parents with nothing but bad options.

The Best Gift You Can Give Your Children: Presence

The Best Gift You Can Give Your Children: Presence

One concept in the discussion struck her most: the best thing any parent or caregiver can do to promote the well-being of a child is to be present.

In this case, “present” means that the parents and caregivers can be attentive and connected when they’re with their children.

Building a Cathedral: a New Perspective on Your Purpose as a Parent

Building a Cathedral: a New Perspective on Your Purpose as a Parent

There’s a parable about a woman who walks by three men working on a building site, each doing the same thing.

The woman asks the first man what he’s doing. “I’m hauling bricks,” he says.

She asks the second man what he’s doing. “I’m building a wall,” he states.

She asks the third man what he’s doing. “I’m building a cathedral,” he answers.

The men are all doing the same action, but their answers show how different they are framing their purpose.