Family Matters

There’s a frequently cited quote by Mr. Rogers that’s often used to excavate the good from crises or tragedies. He told us to “Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.”

He’s so right. But not everyone gets the kind of compassion that I experienced when they face a crisis. It is not just that we help. It is how we help. By offering help in a way that is understanding, kind, and nonjudgmental, we can be the difference between something painfully hard and something that’s hard, but doable.

The Boys and Girls Clubs of Central Arizona have served our local communities for almost 30 years. We are proud to be a leader in after-school and summer services for all children ages six to 18. We are best known for taking care of those that need us most and providing safe spaces essential for childcare, but we aspire to do more – to do whatever it takes for great futures. We are excited to announce that our vision for our local Clubs is to be the greatest thing to do after school. When it comes to our youth, everyone needs support, and all parents and guardians are tirelessly looking for opportunities and positive outlets for their kids.

Today’s seniors are those who helped create the United States as we know it today. They worked hard through the Depression and World War II. In the quad-city area, 42 percent of residents are older than 65. Many of them are isolated and homebound and have limited social interaction.

Polara Health’s Senior Peer Program aims to change that.

FCRB volunteers commit to monthly meetings, by video conference, to review the cases of children who are in out-of-home care. Members of each board review their assigned cases until permanency is achieved. As children return home, are adopted, have guardianship granted or age out of the system, new cases are added to the board’s review day.  The Board makes recommendations to the Juvenile Court and interested parties involved in the case.

Bob Mariano believed wholeheartedly in giving back to his community, which is why he became a Big Brother to Little Brother Kyle in 2004.

That match, through Yavapai Big Brothers Big Sisters, ignited a long-lasting relationship between Bob, his wife Barb, and Kyle … one that went beyond their official match (which lasted more than three years). Kyle remains in touch with the family today.

Kyle is now married, living and working in the Pacific Northwest. “When I met [Bob and Barb],” he said, “I was struggling with self-esteem issues. I felt safe and comfortable right away with the Marianos.”

“My match was important to my development and learning to be who I am today. Bob was a huge role model. He taught me how to treat people and they listened to me without judging me.”

This past November, Prevent Child Abuse America celebrated its 50-year anniversary in Chicago. The celebration included a discussion with Dr. Bruce Perry, who is a member of the board, and Oprah Winfrey, who is, well, Oprah.

As is quite typical of her, in her address to the crowd, Oprah said something deeply meaningful. She talked about one thing that all children need. It’s simple. It’s free. It takes only a second. And it’s the best gift that we can give to kids in our lives, all year round. It’s also the best gift we can give to each other.

Yavapai Big Brothers Big Sisters (YBBBS) creates and professionally supports one-to-one mentoring relationships that ignite the promise in our local youth.

Arlene and Kloe’s match demonstrates the mission well. Matched for more than five years and still going strong, the pair celebrated Kloe’s high school graduation in May 2022, along with nine other graduating Little Brothers and Sisters from the agency.

Positive Child Experiences, also known as PCEs, are advantageous or benevolent childhood experiences that promote positive development and resilience among youth. Researchers have found that positive experiences can protect kids from the negative long-term effects of trauma and Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs), leading them to become healthier, happier adults.

So how do we, as a community, create more PCEs for all of our youth?

On a recent beautiful summer’s day, Big Sister Rebecca Finken took her Little Sister Abigail on a paddleboard adventure on Prescott’s Watson Lake.

This match made by Yavapai Big Brothers Big Sisters (YBBBS) is based on trust, friendship, and having adventures like paddleboarding to show Abigail, 10, what the world around her has to offer. The pair participate in video chats and projects, try out the local climbing gym, visit area attractions, and sometimes just hang out and talk.

All parents and caregivers will need help at some point. Normalizing this is a huge step in supporting families in our community.

While well-meaning people are quick to say, “Let me know if you need anything,” when we see a family going through a tough situation, it’s rare that someone actually takes them up on the offer … because it’s vague and because asking for help is hard in a society that celebrates independence and grit.